Holy motherfucking shitballs. As an aging hipster (or so I’m lead to believe), it’s a rarity that such pablum comes across my, er, uh, ‘desk’ and this, clearly, is no exception.
From a promoter friend of mine that said "dude, The Decade of Rememberance tour is looking for a date!" I mean, come on. I’m only human. Look below. Look at these douche nozzles. Do you really think they’re gonna rage in honor of 9/11? Do they know how to add? 9 PLUS 11? 9 times eleven? Integers thereof? Sweet Jesus, Mary and Joseph. This tour could’ve been here. In Atlanta. But noooooooo, it probably is going to end up in some shit splat burg like Jonesboro or Cumming. Me? I’ve got Earth on that night. Sucks, huh?
Here’s their solicitation. (completely unedited)
Hello,
I am looking to set up a show for Atom Smash, Seasons After, and Diversity. We are asking $1500 (negotiable price) 2 hotel rooms, free drinks and food.
We are looking to book the show for September 10th or 11 for a patriotic show in remembrance of 9/11.
Thanks,
Trevor Holtzclaw
(and remember folks, it ain’t gay if it’s American!)